Miss Manners on Wedding Etiquette for Brides
* On Wedding Dress
Miss Manners says Wedding Etiquette of our age is not very strict anymore. Today, Miss Manners allows brides to wear non-conventional color for a wedding gown. Aside from ultra white, creme, and beige, Miss Manners says that it is not against Wedding Etiquette to wear pastel colored wedding gown, especially if the wedding is a Destination Wedding. For a beach wedding, brides can now wear turquoise or aquamarine colored wedding dress to match the color of the dress with the aqua-blue freshness of the sea waters.
* On Wedding Shoes
Miss Manners says Wedding Etiquette allows brides to wear open toed and ankle strap wedding shoes. According to the modern Miss Manners too, white is not anymore the basic color for wedding shoes. You can go with beige, creme, ivory or even red to match an ultra white wedding gown.
Miss Manners says that shoes should be comfortable and stylish. Rhinestones are good and does not defy Wedding Etiquette. But for the sake of taste, Miss Manners recommends that brides should go for less ornamented shoes.
* On Announcing the Engagement
Miss Manners says that first time brides may announce their engagement in newspapers or if they have the fortune to host an engagement ball, then they can announce the engagement in the said party. If you do not have the money to throw an engagement party, Miss Manners says that you can announce your engagement to close family and friends during a dinner.
For second wedding, Miss Manners recommend to brides with second marriage to talk to their children first before making the public announcement. Then the next person that they should talk to is their parents before the ex-spouse. Miss Manners says that a bride, who does not have any child from her ex-spouse, fails to tell her ex about her engagement does not violate a Wedding Etiquette. According to Miss Manners, the bride have no obligation to her ex-spouse unless they have a children of which they have joint custody.
* On Who to Invite
Miss Manners says that it is the bride and the groom and the host (in case the parents will co-host the wedding) has the say on who are or who are not to invite. But the last say, for Wedding Etiquette's sake, is always upon the lips of the bride and the groom since it is their big day and it is them who are the center of attention.
If the bride or the groom don't prefer to invite an ex-boyfriend who is one of the best employee of the bride's father, then the bride's father cannot command her daughter to invite the old flame even if it is the bride's father who have hosted the wedding.
* On Wedding Registry and Cash Gifts
Miss Manners says no to Cash Gifts. Asking for cash gifts is a Wedding Etiquette blunder. Miss Manners says that asking for cash gifts makes the bride and groom look greedy. Even if the couples want to donate the cash gifts to charity, Miss Manners is still against for couple who will plead for cash gifts. Whichever way one may look at it, people will think that couples who ask for cash gifts have a mark of greed on their foreheads.
Wedding Registry card is okay to Miss Manners, except that you should not insert the registry card on the invitation. Better put up an online registry and tell your guests, through your wedding invitation that a registry is currently online for those who wish to give the couple gifts under the couple's wishlists.
This way, according to Miss Manners, Wedding Etiquette is preserved and you won't look too pushy to your guests.
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